Saturday, April 25, 2015

Pheasant pharmers phucked

So, South Dakota's GOP-owned Bureau of Game, Fish and Plunder has a season on native mourning doves but none on the imported Eurasian collared dove? What a phucking surprise.

Call the uh-oh squad: South Dakota's most phamous invasive species is likely phucked by the bird phlu.
Tim Lund has owned Lake County Pheasant Hatchery for three decades. It's his passion and it's his livelihood. But the looming threat of the bird flu has taken over Tim's every thought. "It would shut me down. There'd be a farm sale here because if it took out everything, I raise a little over 30,000 birds, If it took all of them out it would put me out of business," said Tim. [KSFY teevee]
Money is time.
Imagine a dumpster full of pheasant carcasses with just the breasts cut out. That’s what my friend found after the governor’s hunt back in October, behind the processing place in Fort Pierre that handles the birds. [Kevin Woster, Outdoors in Keloland]
40 below keeps the riff-raff out: remember that old white wives' tale?

The guest list for the 2011 Governors Invitational Pheasant Slaughter reads like an earth hater's group grope. At least 1,376 birds were killed although that number doesn't include other items blasted into oblivion by that murder of Daugaardian crows.
As farmers across the Midwest have simplified the landscape and plowed up grassland to grow more corn and soybeans, habitat for pheasants, quail and other grassland birds has become increasingly scarce and their numbers are falling. In Nebraska, wild pheasant concentrations have fallen 86 percent since their peak in the 1960s. The pheasant harvest during hunting season in Iowa is off 63 percent from the highs reached in the 1970s. In areas that used to be overrun, you’ll struggle to find a pheasant now. [Grant Gerlock, Iowa Public Radio]
Chinese Ring-necked Pheasants don't eat grasshoppers but wild geese and turkeys sure do while the pesticide industry that greases Republican politicos don't give a shit about anything but profits.

Add the extirpation of apex predators, the resulting rise of mesopredators, increasing numbers of domestic dogs and cats then stir in a melange of industrial chemicals and climate change: voila! Red state collapse on parade.

Stupid phuckers.

PeeAir, South Dakota: think Wait, Wait doesn't read me?

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